The Lifter in our Loss
Loss is a painful thing. It really doesn’t matter what form it comes in, it hurts; and it takes a toil on you body, soul, and spirit. Losing someone you love through death can be filled with deep sadness. Losing a child through sickness, miscarriage or suicide leaves a void like none other. Losing a friendship due to misunderstandings can make you question if it’s even worth having friends. And losing your health changes everything as you figure out new ways to adapt in life.
In the last few months, I have experienced all four of these, except I have watched losing a child, and it has been hard, really hard. The realities that must be faced and the future that must be revisioned can be exhausting, overwhelming, and down right depressing. And the enemy would want you to stay there the rest of your life.
So what do you do? What do we do with loss? Well, first, you grieve it. You can almost define grieving as the feelings that come with loss, such as depression, sadness, anger, guilt and more. And because there are so many emotions, it feels like a rollercoaster, depending on the date and time, which makes it hard to process and even harder to talk about. There is just not one single, step-by-step way to experience grief, because it is so fluid and very personal and unique. So feel what you feel and share as you need to with trusted, safe and reliable friends. And above all, take your heart to Jesus. Grieve with Him. He understands grieving. (Isaiah 53:3) And He is the only One who can truly heal your heart. Take it to Him as many times as you need to. He never leaves you nor forsakes you. He will comfort you with His love. The peace of His Presence is like none other.
TAKE YOUR LOSS TO JESUS. HE UNDERSTANDS.
Secondly, keep moving forward. As little or as big, as slow or as fast as you can, keep moving forward. To sit in grief too long is an opportunity for the enemy to wreak havoc in your soul. But moving forward without the grieving, means you are delaying what needs to be faced today. So don’t sweep it under the rug as if it never happened. Grieve the loss but keep moving forward. How does that look? First of all, it is getting into the Word and letting the words of Jesus soothe your soul. Get your mind to praising, to worshipping, even when you don’t feel like it, and to thinking on things that are joyous, purposeful, and positive. (Philippians 4: 8) Ask the Holy Spirit to give you purpose and vision for your future and to reveal what that looks like. Then start taking baby steps in that direction. And if friends invite you to do things, even if you don’t really want to, go anyway. It will do your heart good to be around people who are kind, caring and loving.
And let me say this: moving forward does not mean that we are leaving those we love behind. That can get really twisted in our minds. Instead, our moving forward is a way to honor their lives as we are motivated by the things that were important to them or as we keep their memory alive. Move forward and let their memory motivate you, not isolate you.
LET THEIR MEMORY MOTIVATE YOU,
NOT ISOLATE YOU.
Finally, stay close to Jesus. We can sometimes in the angry part of grief be tempted to run from God, when in actuality, we need Him more than ever. So stay close. Run to Him. Press in. Pour out your heart. And let Him hold you, heal you, and help you.
Psalm 3:3 “But you, O LORD, are a shield about me, my glory, and the Lifter of my head.”
IN OUR GRIEF, HE IS THE LIFTER OF OUR HEADS.
When loss enters your world, grieve it...however you need to, for as long as you need to. But then, wash your face and keep moving forward. Take your loss to Jesus and let him lift up your head. There's a whole lot of comfort, peace, and strength in the face of Jesus.
You are loved,
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